Forty Years Fat Is Enough! part 6

My Journey Continues

Raw and Unedited–Kinda like my life…

DO BETTER TODAY

“Help! I’m falling back into my old habits. You know, eating whatever, whenever… I have GOT to STOP this.” I type as I sit at Panera Bread wiping the gooey egg yolk from my fingers and brushing away the crumbs from the brioche bun that have fallen onto my keyboard. “I’ll do better tomorrow.”

DO BETTER TODAY

These past few weeks have been a struggle. I don’t know why, I was doing so well. Strike that. I do know why. Because I am not trying. I am doing what I’ve always done. Which is lying to myself. “Oh, eat that. It’s okay. You’ll go back to your plan tomorrow.” If only that were true. I never go back to my plan tomorrow. Because tomorrow never comes. Rinse and repeat. To infinity.

DO BETTER TODAY

Why, when I know this about myself do I continue to believe it will be different? I started out so well. I’ve lost nearly 25 pounds. I’ve lost many inches. I’ve gone down sizes in clothing. I FEEL GOOD! But that’s not going to stay that way for long if I don’t get back on track. And stay there. Seriously, this is not a diet but the way to eat for life.

I am not totally off track. But I’ve indulged in so much bread these past few weeks. And sugar. My willpower has been pretty much nonexistent. And that’s on me. I know I can do this because I had been doing this. I let myself slip and, well, downhill and alla that…

DO BETTER TODAY

It’s like that damn diet coke. I gave it up for ten long months. TEN MONTHS of NO diet coke. I drank a lot of tea. Drank water. Allowed myself some diet 7up occasionally. But once I had one, there was no going back. Oh, I’ll just have one in the morning I told myself. Well, maybe another in the afternoon. Another after dinner wouldn’t hurt… Yeah, for me with diet coke it’s all or nothing apparently. As long as I wasn’t have any, I was okay. But once I had one, well their stock went up let me tell ya. But I’ll do better tomorrow.

DO BETTER TODAY

So, I’m sitting here psyching myself up to do this thing. To eat like I know I should. And to stop this diet coke obsession. To stop making excuses. To stop justifying what I am doing to myself. To stop telling myself it’s okay today, I’ll do better tomorrow.

DO BETTER TODAY

 

 

Author: sjmais

What can I say, I'm a ginger and Grammie extraordinaire. Trying my hand at a wee bit o' writing just for fun.

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